Waiting for Change?

This is the second instalment on following you heart.
It’s about having the hard conversation, doing the hard thing, making the hard changes.

Now when I say hard, it can feel really hard, but sometimes it’s harder in our head than it actually plays out.
painting mighty lion and tiger head on ornamental background and mystic woman face, computer collage

Have you been waiting for someone or something to change?

I was waiting for the LONGEST TIME for my husband to end our marriage. I was the one that was unhappy, and look, probably he was too – but he’s the kind of person that would NEVER make the change or have the hard conversation. He would never.
So it had to be me, and it was really annoying and frustrating, and I did all the things to push him to do it, but it was never going to happen that way. I in the end, and I guess there was a part of me that was saying “why does it have to be me? why is it my responsibility? why am I in charge here? why me? WHY?” And I could just say that it’s because he’s that person that would be miserable for the rest of his life but would never do anything about it.
But I’m not that person. Sure, I put up with my own misery for a long time. I put up with my own lack of worth, that whole feeling that I wasn’t going to be able to do better anyway. And also…that it was going to be hard.
I’m not going to say that it’s been easy by any stretch of the imagination, but actually it hasn’t been hard. It’s only been hard when I’ve thought it’s going to be hard, or when I make it hard.
I did a lot of preparation, a lot of self work, lots of kinesiology, lots of self exploration, took appropriate Liquid Crystals,  worked on and cleared a lot of my stuff that was holding me back.

And maybe that’s what you need to do.

But don’t wait for the other person to be the one to do it if you’re the one that’s unhappy.
Don’t wait for the other person if you’re the one that wants change.
Don’t wait for the other person, even if there’s other people involved, like children.
Don’t wait for the other person, because actually it IS up to you.
If you’re the one that’s not happy, regardless of their happiness – because you are not responsible for anyone’s happiness other than your own.
So really….only you can do it. Only you can do it.
There’s probably really nothing, that’s worth waiting…..I waited years…..I even made the living together horrible, even for myself, I wasn’t a nice person, and I pushed and pushed…but in the end, it had to be me.
It had to be me because I was the one that was unhappy. I was the one that wanted change. I was the one that actually realised that I can do better – and by that I don’t mean doing better in terms of a relationship, but I can do better for ME. I can do better for me to be happy, and follow my heart, and not wait for someone else to do it for me. Because you might be in a situation where the other person will never ever do it.
So why would you wait for someone else to make a decision that you’ve already made?
You have the power, you are most definitely worthy, and you can do better. You can do better for you.

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