The Day I Quit

It’s today.

When your existential crisis goes on and on…..and on. And nothing you’ve been doing is working. You keep throwing things at it. But then you realise that it’s sending you deeper into the shadows.

They say that this is where the good stuff is. Creation. Pure potential. But right now?

I want to give up.
I want to throw in the towel.
I want to give notice at the clinic.
I want to leave all of the business groups, and ALSO the spiritual groups I’m in.
I want to sell…or even GIVE AWAY all of my tools, all of them, books, cards, crystals, Liquid Crystals.
I want to shut down my website, and any other online platforms I’m using for business.
I want to close my business.
I want to walk away from the beautiful connections I’ve made on this path.

It all just feels too much. I’m an optimist by nature, but right now, my faith reserves are low.

And also……I want to shut it all down. The gifts I’ve been working to cultivate. Everything…that has lead me down this path. I want to turn it off. Hit the snooze button on awakening. Please let me go back to sleep.

I’m tired. Tired of ‘doing the work’ but feeling like I’m getting nowhere. So. Tired.

So even with all this. When ‘my guides’ are silent. When the information isn’t forthcoming. I hear one tiny voice.
Please don’t give up.
But I really want to.
Please don’t give up.
But I’m so tired.
Please don’t give up.
I have to.

I don’t know what happens next. Maybe nothing. For now though, I’m done.

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